Sometimes, you’re just due.

Part 1

“Mommy! Why can’t I see anything?”  The five-year-old had been waking up at 4:38 a.m. for most of that week. Who knows why?  The power had gone out while we were sleeping. I found him a flashlight and tucked him back in with two books.  I checked to make sure our phone alarms were set and that they had full batteries. Consumers reported 200 customers without power in a narrow band down a main road and estimated that our service would return around 7 a.m.  I tried to go back to sleep.  

When I gave up and got out of bed, the estimate for power restoration was 8 a.m.  We did the morning by candle and flashlight. The boys ate dry cereal and I did the best I could with my makeup.  We had extra time because no one was distracted by NPR or Youtube. Because our washing machine had puked the previous weekend, Malcolm had to be convinced to wear corduroy pull ons from the bottom of his drawer.  In true If You Give a Mouse a Cookie fashion, the little one greeted Friday in a llama print shirt, clip-on bow tie and hair that stuck up in the front.  He insisted on rain boots to complete his look. We all knew a storm was coming.

When we pulled out of the driveway, the estimated time for restoration was 9 a.m.  Dropping off the big one was uneventful. However, due to circumstances beyond the control of mortals, my two elementary-aged children attend school in the same district, but attend two buildings.  This would not require gymnastics of executive functioning on most days, except for the fact that the buildings are ten minutes apart and keep hours within five minutes of each other. As of the first day of school, the entire city is under construction.  If I ever get arrested, the best odds are that something went down in the pick up and drop off line.  

We have a routine that works unless something minute happens, and we made it to our second destination just in time to give my poor friend a heart attack.  She observed my child, who every other day, like, ever, rolls in with bedhead and track pants, skip inside with a tie and concluded that she must have missed the memo about picture day.  The joke is on her; she thinks I know what I’m doing. Her baby girl was doing her, after a lengthy conversation about whether a long top, athletic shorts, and cowboy boots were the right call for mid October.  I just love them both.

I downed some much needed caffeine before seeing my first student.  I checked my phone extra because the new washing machine was being delivered between an oh-so-specific window of eight and noon.  Because I had a relatively flexible schedule that morning, and because I like to live dangerously, I trusted their promise of a twenty minute warning before delivery. 

My husband texted to worry together about the inch of rain predicted that day and the new restoration estimate of 11:45 a.m.   Would we be able to run our sump? Our property backs up to a river. The basement flooded when I was pregnant with Malcolm. The resulting mess instigated major drainage redesign to the tune of several thousand dollars and half our yard exhumed.  Flooding is an understandably touchy subject. Many people in my town have a touch of flood trauma. Our town includes several rivers, and has been flooding with increasing regularity. The sun was still shining, but we knew enough not to trust it.

The chance of rain was one hundred percent. 

The storm was most definitely coming.

The Ghost of Parenting Fails Past

I only kind of checked my schedule last week.  It’s August and I’m about as untwisted as I’m going to get before I let the new school year frenzy creep up and eat my zen.  My kids attend quite a bit of day camp in the summer. There are a lot of awesome opportunities in my town and a lot of them fit my kids’ interest.  There’s nature camp, robotics camp, theater camp, Pokemon camp. Every year when the push to sign up comes out in freaking March I wonder if I’m overscheduling my kids.  Every year, I remember the summer before and sign up for one more. My kids get a lot out of camp, and I get a lot of them being at camp. (See my previous complaints re: the punching.)  It’s nice to have different permutations of family members in the house during the summer. When one kid is at camp, there are special activities for the child at home. When both kids are at camp there are naps and Netflix.

Last week my schedule said that Wes and wizard camp in the morning and Mac had nature camp in the afternoon.  Wes and I rolled in to the Community Center and Wes enjoyed the free breakfast provided there while I went to check him in.  I was feeling pretty cool. We had attended camp there already this summer and we had a routine we liked. The bemused teenager in charge of the sign-in binder informed me that wizard camp was an afternoon session.  Sometimes, when you’re really anxious, and a kind of benin mistake like this happens, it’s a relief. It felt like: oh, good, here is the inevitable mistake, and it’s not a bad one.  I have a much higher watermark in this domain.  I vowed to come back later, congratulating myself for not having mixed it up in reverse and missed a day of camp by arriving in the afternoon.  

So we rerouted the day.  We were in the next town over, with Mac at a doctor’s visit because his superpower is being inconveniently ill.  It was late morning and we were waiting on the doc when I got a call from the Center for the Arts wondering why Wes wasn’t at wizard camp.   I had taken Wes to the wrong facility and I would have figured it out way sooner if we didn’t have a cross town Harry Potter camp rivalry that week.  But it wasn’t really fixable at that point. We’d make it to camp the next day. We didn’t have a choice. It didn’t matter how I felt about it. 

Two years ago I proudly arrived on Wednesday for a three day camp that I believed ran until Friday.  It began on Monday and Wednesday was the last day. We had billed it as the last cool fun thing to do in the summer.  Ugh. The picture above is from the awesome, fun adventures we had on the days we had blocked for camp attendance. Wes hit the jackpot on I can’t remember what in the arcade and won a ton of tickets.  We went to a million playgrounds. We had a ton of fun, but it wasn’t the purest-spirited bonding time. I felt super guilty and it colors that memory.


Wes was fine.  He was fine then, and he was extra fine when I messed it up this time.  When he was in Kindergarten, he told the story of my scheduling mistake to other adults who had made a mistake: our photographer when she mixed up the dates, his teacher when she forgot something, everyone.  Only Wes could throw me under the bus in such a sweet way. See everyone, if it could happen to my mom, it could happen to anyone.  We all make mistakes sometimes. I think the lesson of universal human fallibility is worth taking the time to teach our kids.  I think this especially because I very recently fucked up. Nonetheless, I think it’s good for my kids to watch me mess up sometimes.  It’s important for them to know that these things happen to everyone. Or they happen to me. And I’m hoping it’s not just me.